Dear Amy: In three months, my wife and I will celebrate our daughter's first birthday.
Two of our friends are adopting their first child soon, and we couldn't be more thrilled for them, but I am hesitant about having my immediate family attend our daughter's party with this couple.
My mother is a very conservative Catholic, and our friends are gay men. I'm afraid my mother will embarrass us by making a scene at what is supposed to be a joyous occasion for our baby and us. Mom knows we associate with people whom she disapproves of, but I have never told her that we are friends with a gay couple who are adopting a child.
My mother helps us out by baby-sitting during the week (a huge savings for us). I'm afraid her outrage at having her granddaughter exposed to what she would consider an abnormal lifestyle would be detrimental to the relationships.
Should we have two separate gatherings (one for our conservative families and one for our more open-minded friends), exclude our friends or family, or invite everyone and turn my daughter's birthday into a political statement?
-- Birthday Dad
See answer @ Invite conservative mom, gay friends over for party
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